talksexxxy.com

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God Is with Us, Amen. (I’m really getting horny for you Jesus!)

A man who wants to fuck a teenage girl at a catholic school, a man who wants to play the priest seduced by the young woman and a man who wants to play priest while I play nun and we teach a young boy and girl all about temptation. Well I just feel closer to God already.

It feels like there must have been another theme again, or something in the air that said, “for the next 48 hours religious fantasies are SO hot.”

An ex girlfriend of mine had a big thing for Religious stuff. She told me about how once in high school he had sex with a boyfriend in the upper level (I guess the balcony) of the church in her town. She was basically like, I’m totally gay, except for the fact that I fantasies about fucking a priest. That would probably be the only heterosexual sex fantasy she has. She said there was something about defiling a, ‘man of God.’

I think I get how this can be totally sexy, the power in it, the forbidden filthiness of it. I’ve never played with this myself. Though I had an ex-boyfriend who once sent me a link to this religious cartoon explaining that when bad things happen to us that we just don’t understand, it is because Jesus is mad at us for something and he is punishing us. It explained that, when bad things happen to us it is like Jesus is spanking us. So we need to sit and think about why Jesus is spanking us. I thought that was totally hot when I read it, but that was more of a punishment spanking thing than a Jesus thing.

Either way, all of this made me more curious about religious kinks. To see what would pop up I Googled, “I want to fuck Jesus.”

The fist thing that came was this article: And all I can say is Woah!

“Loving Jesus is a term that members of the Children of God/Family International cult use to describe their sexual relationship with Jesus. This doctrine was introduced in 1995, and is taught to all members as young as 12, but more fully from the age of 14. The Family describes the Loving Jesus teachings as a radical form of “bridal theology.” It is their understanding of the Bible that the followers of Christ are his bride, called to love and serve him with the fervor of a wife. They take bridal theology further than other Christians by encouraging members to imagine that Jesus is having sex with them during sexual intercourse and masturbation. Male members are told to visualize themselves as women, in order to avoid a homosexual relationship with Jesus (male homosexuality is an offense warranting excommunication). Additionally, members are instructed to say “love words,” or talk dirty, to Jesus as they are having sex. Karen Zerby has published a list of sexually explicit expressions that her followers could use during sex with Jesus.”
Talking Dirty To Jesus! Oh that’s amazing. I googled more and found that list they reference published by Karen Zerby. So for all of you out there with a Jesus crush, here is a list of sweet nothings to whisper to our Lord And Savior next time you are thinking of him. She separates them in two categories, Less Erotic and More Erotic. The More Erotic ones were a more interesting read for me so I have copied some of the best ones below. But if you are interested in seeing all of them for yourself here’s the link:
http://xfamily.org/index.php/Love_words_to_Jesus

More Erotic:
•    I’m all naked for You, Jesus, and desperate for Your love! Come to me.
•    I want to enjoy You, Jesus, to look at You, to taste You, to feel You, to fuck You!
•    I’m getting so hot for You! I’ve got to have Your lips on mine!
•    Jesus, so sexy–sexier than I ever dreamed–so handsome, so naked and so hard!
•    Touch me through the hands that You made. Possess me!
•    I’m really getting horny for You, Jesus.
•    Jesus, show me what I can do to You to make You feel good.
•    Jesus, I’ll do anything for You. I’ll do anything to give You pleasure. Let me satisfy You.
•    I want to suck Your penis. I want to suck Your seeds!
•    My pussy is excited for You, Jesus!
•    I’m prepared, Jesus. I’m wet. I’m wanting You.
•    I’m so excited and I’m so horny for You, Jesus!
•    I can’t wait. I’ve got to have You, Jesus! I’ve got to have You inside me!
•    Jesus. I’m hot for You! My legs are spread to receive Your penis!  Give me Your seeds.
•    I’m desperate for Your big, hard penis! I crave it, because I want Your seeds!
•    I receive Your love, Lord, with open arms and open legs and a receptive heart.
•    Come into me, Jesus. Fuck me. Make me go, Jesus!
•    Hurry, Jesus! I need You now.
•    Come, Jesus! Oh please, come!
•    Jesus, You’re the best! No other love can compare.

Hallelujah.MP3

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6 responses

  1. StanFlouride Avatar
    StanFlouride

    I came here from Pharyngula, glad that I did even though I expect I’ll spend the rest of the day exploring and get very little work done!
    As someone with a rather kinky penchant I have often encountered the ‘nice-Catholic-girl-who-needs-to-be-taken/punished-so-she’s-not-guilty-of-sin’ manifestation and I am sending a link to this list to 3 of them, including my ex-wife.

    Reply
    1. --- Avatar
      —

      Hey StanFlouride! Thanks for the comment. I’ve just been responding to a bunch of them now, as I haven’t been on here very much at all as of late. I’ve still been writing about my calls, but wasn’t posting them. I’m excited to start up again though. So I hope you liked reading the blog (and that your lovers and wife did too!).

      There is something pretty sexy about that fantasy, hey!? For me especially coming from the submissive point of view.

      Reply
  2. GroovyJ Avatar
    GroovyJ

    So I’m thinking it’s safe to say they don’t date outside the cult much. Or at least, they don’t get many repeat dates outside the cult.

    I’m going to have to memorize some of those, in case I ever need someone to break up with me.

    Reply
    1. --- Avatar
      —

      Hahahah! totally. I am thinking I would get broken up with pretty fast if I uttered the works, “My pussy is excited for You, Jesus!” to one of my lovers. But, you never know! Mostly, I think I would just make them go into a laughing fit!!!! I’ll have to give it a try.

      Reply
  3. Paul Murray Avatar
    Paul Murray

    Another Pharynguilite here. Check out Theresa of Ávila, or “the ecstasy of St Teresa”.

    Reply
    1. --- Avatar
      —

      Hey Paul! thanks for the comment and the tip!

      If anyone is interested here is the wiki article: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ecstasy_of_Saint_Theresa

      Really interesting read! Thanks again Paul, and thanks for visiting!

      Reply

Leave a comment

The fictional play is based on a blog I wrote while working as a phone sex operator and I did that job over 15 years ago.

The blog you’re looking now.

Even then friends thought phone sex was kind of light and fluffy – how can there be any money in that? It already seemed old fashioned. A friend told me, he assumed I must have been lying and just didn’t want to admit that I was camming. I think that says more about what he was googling than where the money is in online sex work. 

I wasn’t lying and it wasn’t light and fluffy. You might assume now – 15 years later – phone sex… NOW it must be old fashioned. It must be a thing of the past like your  landline – the things that people wanted to talk about then they still want to talk about now. They are the things that often (hopefully) the closest you get to them are only in your mind. 

The blog was bad. It is bad… I’m cringing while rereading it now.

It was anonymous. My daily views were like zero to two. I sent it to a couple of friends who just expressed their concern for me and how they read some of it, but they weren’t able to keep reading it. 

One day, my phone was going a little berserk, and I was getting notification after notification. I freaked out. I went online and I saw that a more popular blog had found mine and reblogged it and in less than 24 hours it had been viewed like over 10K times. I logged on and I made it private so that no one could look at it. I know 10K doesn’t seem viral by today’s standards… I mean, I posted my mom on Tiktok and she got over 8 million – but it was different then and at the time, 10K in a day was way too much. Why put something online, if all you do once people look at it is hide it? I wrote quickly and badly. And I was writing honestly… and honestly… I…